Tuesday, February 24, 2009

A Hungry Man is an Angry Man

Microwave dinners usually have crazy instructions on them for me; that I should cut slits, remove the plastic, stir some of the contents, replace the plastic, let it sit for a minute, then microwave it again. It's really ridiculous, so usually I just take a fork or knife and poke a few holes over the foods it mentions then microwave it once and that's it. The Hungry-Man dinner I just ate had a bunch of crazy instructions like this (remove the brownie..? how is that even possible without smashing it up into bits?), but that was just the beginning.

I was able to successfully do a lazy job of heating it up, though the potatoes were still frozen at the middle, but I ate it just the same. This dinner was fried chicken flavor, but even though I knew chicken has bones in it, I still was able to convince myself that a microwave dinner is a lazy food and I could just pick up the chicken and bite into it without worry. Now, I think bones are funny, but inside food I'm eating is one of the places they shouldn't be, especially for a microwave dinner. After I had stuffed the whole piece of chicken in my mouth, I had to remove a dozen small bone pieces. It was unpleasant! I don't even feel full after eating this. Hungry-Man dinners are supposed to be the last word when it comes to getting two thousand calories in one meal and being done with food for a while, but I know I could eat about four more of these right now at least! I used to think that when a frozen meal says "Hungry-Man" on it, that meant something.

All I'm left with now is a pile of bones.